Ultimate Guide to Psychometric Compatibility

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By David Webb, Expert Psychology Author

Why learning about your own psychology is so important, and how you can find truly compatible relationships using psychometric tests.

Vera is changing how like-minded people find each other in the 21st century. We passionately believe that matching people based on compatible personalities, interests and values are the key to helping them make deep and meaningful human connections. 

That’s why we use fun, powerful and insightful psychometric tests to help our users develop great friendships, build meaningful relationships and discover love and romance. Sound interesting? Read on to learn more.

I can’t stress this enough: The single thing that will guarantee a happy, fulfilled and calmer life is the quality of your human relationships, especially the people you love and who love you back. —Joanna Coles


Literally meaning “mental measurement” and with a history dating back over a century, psychometrics is a scientific discipline concerned with the assessment of psychological characteristics, behavior and performance. This assessment is made possible via tests which are typically developed and administered by psychologists with specialized graduate training. 

For more details on the guiding principles of psychometric testing, visit the British Psychological Society’s Psychological Testing Centre (PTC). The PTC provides information and services relating to standards in tests and testing for test takers, test users, test developers and members of the public.

Free psychometric tests can easily be completed in a few minutes on a smartphone

All psychometric tests are designed to reveal specific things about the test taker. As Dr. Lisa Dorn notes “The principle is that when you administer a psychometric assessment what you are doing is trying to highlight the extent to which people believe certain things, how they feel about certain things and how they will generally behave“.

This is why psychometric compatibility assessment is at the heart of what we do here at Vera; because when it comes to forming relationships, the more compatible you are with people in terms of your behavior and what you believe and feel about things, the more authentic and fulfilling these new relationships are going to be.

The notion that opposites attract is simply not true.

The American Psychological Association defines compatibility as The state in which two or more people relate harmoniously because their attitudes, traits, and desires match or complement those of the other or others; and the reason compatibility is so important in the context of relationships is because the notion that opposites attract is simply not true.

For over half a century, countless research studies have consistently found that our personal interest in other people and how attractive and likable we consider them to be, increases significantly when the person in question has attitudes, interests, values and personality traits which are similar to ours.

In his article Do Opposites Attract? Professor of Psychology, Matthew D. Johnson states that “there is clear and convincing evidence that birds of a feather flock together. For human beings, the attractiveness of similarity is so strong that it is found across cultures.”

What is psychometric compatibility?

Put simply, psychometric compatibility measures the extent to which you align with other people across a range of dimensions; some of the most important of which in predicting relationship success include:

  • IQ compatibility
  • Emotional intelligence compatibility
  • Attachment style compatibility
  • Myers-Briggs compatibility
  • The Big Five model of personality compatibility
  • Political values compatibility

IQ compatibility

IQ stands for intelligence quotient and is a measure of human intelligence. A person’s IQ is assessed in the form of a single numeric score which is derived from a set of standardized tests, designed to measure such things as reasoning, memory and verbal comprehension. Dr. Stefan Dombrowski, a widely published expert on the topic of evidence-based psychological assessment, argues that when interpreted correctly, modern IQ tests are valid measures of intelligence. 

The high IQ society Mensa, points out that there is no such thing as a typical member of Mensa, citing as evidence the fact that when it comes to educational background, its members “range from preschoolers to high school dropouts to people with multiple doctorates.” There is also significant diversity across the occupations of Mensa members…”the range is staggering: police officers and professors, truck drivers and taxidermists, manual labourers and military personnel, doctors and delivery drivers, farmers and firefighters, scientists and singers, government officials and glassblowers – the diverse list goes on and on“.

Among the findings relating to IQ compatibility, research has shown that people typically seek out friends and partners with similar IQs. A finding consistent with the similarity theory of relationships which maintains that along with other types of compatibility, having a similar level of intelligence is more likely to facilitate meaningful relationship experiences and result in less relationship conflict.

You can assess your own IQ and find people with whom you share IQ compatibility by trying this IQ test provided by Psychometrica.

Emotional intelligence compatibility

Not to be confused with IQ, emotional intelligence, also known as (EI) and emotional quotient (EQ) refers to the ability to recognize, regulate, and understand our own emotions, as well as the ability to read the emotions of those around us.

The concept of emotional intelligence dates back to the 1960s, but it was the work of internationally renowned psychologist Daniel Goleman, Ph.D., and most notably his bestselling book in 1995, which resulted in an explosion of interest and scientific research in the subject. Of particular interest are the four major components of emotional intelligence: self-awareness, social awareness, self-regulation and conflict management.

Emotional intelligence has been shown to have an influential effect on many aspects of our lives, such as our ability to build and maintain strong long-term relationships with friends and romantic partners.

You can assess your own emotional intelligence and find people with whom you share EI compatibility by trying this EI test provided by Psychometrica.

Attachment style compatibility

Having an informed sense of both your own attachment style and the attachment styles of others can be hugely beneficial within relationships. Not only can it help explain the strengths and weaknesses of past and current relationships but it can also allow you to have more realistic expectations when forging new ones. 

Like emotional intelligence, research into attachment styles has become a topic of enduring interest in recent years. Growing out of the groundbreaking work of attachment in children by psychologists John Bowlby and Mary Ainsworth, it is widely acknowledged that there are four major adult attachment styles:

  1. Secure Attachment Style
  2. Anxious/Preoccupied Attachment Style
  3. Dismissive/Avoidant Attachment Style
  4. Fearful/Disorganized Attachment Style

People with an anxious/preoccupied attachment style can be overly dependent on others and feel insecure within relationships. People with a dismissive/avoidant style often reject intimacy and appear emotionally distant in their relationships and those with a fearful/disorganized style may actively steer clear of building relationships. In contrast, people with a healthy secure attachment style typically exhibit traits which are the exact opposite of those found within the other attachment styles. 

The good news is that attachment styles can change. More secure attachment within new relationships is always possible, especially when you meet people who are compatible with you in a number of meaningful ways. To learn more about attachment, check out What Is Attachment And How Does It Affect Our Relationships? by Gery Karantzas, associate professor in Social Psychology and Relationship Science at Deakin University.

Myers-Briggs compatibility

The Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) is one of the most extensively used personality assessment tests in the world. Named after its mother and daughter creators, Katharine Cook Briggs and Isabell Briggs Myers, the MBTI was originally developed in the 1940’s. According to the Myers & Briggs Foundation the MBTI is designed to make Carl Jung’s influential theory of psychological types understandable and applicable to people’s everyday lives.

The MBTI consists of questions exploring the preferences of the test taker in relation to four key dimensions:

  1. A preferred focus on either the outer or inner world i.e., Extraversion (E) or Introversion (I)
  2. A preferred focus on basic information or deeper interpretation and meaning i.e., Sensing (S) or Intuition (N).
  3. A preferred focus on logical decisions or decisions based on the people and circumstances involved i.e., Thinking (T) or Feeling (F).
  4. A preferred focus on getting things decided quickly or being open to new information and interpretations i.e., Judging (J) or Perceiving (P).

Based on the answers given to the questions across these four dimensions, the test taker is assigned one of 16 personalities, expressed as a four-letter code.

Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) Chart


Responsible, sincere, analytical, reserved, realistic, systematic. Hardworking and trustworthy with sound practical judgment.


Warm, considerate, gentle, responsible, pragmatic, thorough. Devoted caretakers who enjoy being helpful to others.


Idealistic, organized, insightful, dependable, compassionate, gentle. Seek harmony and cooperation, enjoy intellectual stimulation.


Innovative, independent, strategic, logical, reserved, insightful. Driven by their own original ideas to achieve improvements.


Action-oriented, logical, analytical, spontaneous, reserved, independent. Enjoy adventure, skilled at understanding how mechanical things work.


Gentle, sensitive, nurturing, helpful, flexible, realistic. Seek to create a personal environment that is both beautiful and practical.


Sensitive, creative, idealistic, perceptive, caring, loyal. Value inner harmony and personal growth, focus on dream and possibilities.


Intellectual, logical, precise, reserved, flexible, imaginative. Original thinkers who enjoy speculation and creative problem solving.


Outgoing, realistic, action-oriented, curious, versatile, spontaneous. Pragmatic problem solvers and skillful negotiators.


Playful, enthusiastic, friendly, spontaneous, tactful, flexible. Have strong common sense, enjoy helping people in tangible ways.


Enthusiastic, creative, spontaneous, optimistic, supportive, playful. Value inspiration, enjoy starting new projects, see potential in others.


Inventive, enthusiastic, strategic, enterprising, inquisitive, versatile. Enjoy new ideas and challenges, value inspiration.


Efficient, outgoing, analytical, systematic, dependable, realistic. Like to run the show and get things done in an orderly fashion.


Friendly, outgoing, reliable, conscientious, organized, practical. Seek to be helpful and please others, enjoy being active and productive.


Caring, enthusiastic, idealistic, organized, diplomatic, responsible. Skilled communicators who value connection with people.


Strategic, logical, effcient, outgoing, ambitious, independent. Effective organizers of people and long-range planners.


The four pairs of preferences or “dichotomies” indicate an individual’s preference for attitudes and functions:

Introversion — Extraversion
INtuition — Sensing
Feeling — Thinking
Perception — Judging

It should be pointed out that questions have been raised over the MBTI’s reliability and validity and that when the purpose of the MBTI is misunderstood, it can be misused. For example, the MBTI was never designed to predict job performance, but is often used to do so. 

Writing for Psychology Today, Ronald E. Riggio, Ph.D., suggests that perhaps the most effective use of the MBTI is as a tool for self-reflection. This makes sense, particularly when you consider the words of Isabell Briggs Myers who stated that “The understanding of type can make your perceptions clearer, your judgments sounder, and your life closer to your heart’s desire“.

The Big Five model of personality compatibility

Another very popular personality assessment test, The Big Five test measures the essential traits that above all others are said to reveal our core personality. Often referred to by the acronym OCEAN, the big five personality dimensions are:

Open to Experience – a core trait reflecting how broad-minded and imaginative a person is.

Conscientiousness – a core trait reflecting how persistent, dependable and responsible a person is.

Extroversion – a core trait reflecting how outgoing, sociable and gregarious a person is.

Agreeable – a core trait reflecting how courteous, cooperative, forgiving and soft hearted a person is.   

Neuroticism – a core trait reflecting how anxious, insecure and emotionally stable a person is.

When it comes to relationship compatibility and personality traits, renowned clinical psychologist and professor emeritus at the University of Toronto, Dr. Jordan Peterson claims that if you are looking for a stable partner, what you definitely don’t want is too big of a mismatch between yourself and a potential partner on the big 5 personality dimensions. In outlining this view, which he notes has support within the relevant research literature, Peterson offers the example of an extrovert who has an introverted partner; claiming that there will be continuous conflict among the couple regarding the scale and nature of their social activity. Peterson argues that it’s very difficult for people to see eye to eye within relationships when they differ widely on core personality traits, because it’s not simply about a difference of opinion, it’s essentially about the needs of different types of people.

Political values and compatibility

Values are fundamental beliefs that act as a guide to what is important in a person’s life. They shape our view of the world and help guide our behavior. Truth, love, integrity, happiness and fairness are examples of the many personal values we hold dear. In the context of relationships, the extent to which we share our values with other people can have a direct bearing on the quality of those relationships. 

Perhaps unsurprisingly given the turbulent landscape in recent years, political values have been shown to be particularly important as far as relationship compatibility is concerned. According to Fiona MacDonald, assistant professor in political science at the University of Northern British Columbia, political polarization has become an increasing topic of concern for many people across multiple areas of their lives.

Interestingly, however, Dr. MacDonald notes that the research literature suggests that…” it’s not disagreement over policy that drives polarization, but rather our emotional feelings and perceptions about the nature of the world around us.” Hence the reason our members here at Vera are not only matched on their core values but also on their emotional make-up and other firmly held convictions.

Why compatible relationships matter

In an interview about her book ‘Love Rules: How to Find a Real Relationship in a Digital World‘ author Joanna Coles, stated “I can’t stress this enough: The single thing that will guarantee a happy, fulfilled and calmer life is the quality of your human relationships, especially the people you love and who love you back. You don’t have to be in love all the time but you need to be surrounded by people you have a genuine connection with.”

We couldn’t agree more! Relationships should be a consistent source of joy, support, personal growth and love and kindness. Sadly, however, for far too many people, relationships are a source of conflict, disappointment and unhappiness.

That’s why our mission here at Vera is to help people make the right connections with the right people through psychometric compatibility, something you hopefully know more about having read this article.

With this in mind, we invite you to learn even more about who we are and how we can help. A great place to start would be our tests. We have a free personality test, a free ethical values test and a free character test which we think you will find really interesting.

Thanks for your time, we’ll leave you with some timeless words of wisdom from someone who knew a thing or two about human nature:

“Love looks not with the eyes but with the mind”.

(William, Shakespeare A Midsummer Night’s Dream: Act 1, scene 1)

How to find psychometrically compatibility relationships

Want to make amazing friends while learning more about yourself? The free Vera app was designed by psychology and relationship experts to introduce compatible people with the aim of establishing interesting conversations, friendships, or relationships. Meet people near you and around the world and learn what true psychometric compatibility feels like. Download the Vera app now or try our recommended free psychometric tests.

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